There’s something refreshing about a company that names itself Thick Ass Glass. No pretense, no mystique—just a straightforward promise about what you’re getting. In an industry drowning in Instagram hype and thousand-dollar “functional art,” TAG has quietly built a devoted following by focusing on what actually matters: glass that works and doesn’t break.
I caught up with Brian Handschuh, the engineer-turned-glassmaker behind TAG, to discuss why he started making bongs that could survive a nuclear winter, why most percolators are poorly designed, and how his company manages to compete with luxury brands while charging a fraction of the price. Fair warning: if you’re attached to your thin, overpriced glass, this conversation might hurt.
Dana Morano: Brian, you’ve been making “thick ass glass” since 2013. What was the breaking point—pun intended—that made you start TAG?
Brian Handschuh: You know that feeling when you buy something that should be simple and functional, but it’s just… wrong? That was me with every bong I owned. Thin glass that cracked if you looked at it wrong. Percolators that created more drag than diffusion. Joints that didn’t line up properly. I’m particular about design—maybe it’s the German in me—and I couldn’t stand how the industry was racing to make everything cheaper and worse.
The final straw was watching a $200 piece crack from normal temperature change. Not dropped, not knocked over—just went from room temperature to warm water. That’s when I decided if no one else was going to make properly engineered glass, I would.
DM: Your approach seems almost aggressively practical. While other brands are dropping limited editions with famous artists, you’re publishing blog posts about downstem measurements. Is this the least sexy marketing strategy in cannabis?
BH: [laughs] Probably! But here’s the thing—our customers don’t need to be sold on fantasy. They need to know if a 14mm bowl will fit their 18mm joint. They want to understand why their current bong has too much drag.
We published a guide recently breaking down bowl sizes, and people went crazy for it. Why? Because no one else bothers explaining this stuff. Everyone assumes you either know everything or you’ll figure it out after wasting money on incompatible parts.
DM: Let’s talk about that. Your blog post “Bong Bowl Sizes: Why the Right Fit Matters” reads like an engineering manual. Who’s your audience here—aerospace engineers who smoke?
BH: Just people who are tired of guessing! You’d be amazed how many experienced smokers don’t know you can use a penny to measure joint size. If it fits in the opening, you’ve got an 18mm joint. If it doesn’t, probably 14mm. Simple, but no one tells you this stuff.
Our audience is anyone who thinks “it would be nice if this expensive thing I’m buying actually worked properly.” That includes everyone from college kids buying their first real piece to 50-year-old professionals upgrading their setup.
DM: Speaking of expensive, you’re pretty blunt about calling out overpriced glass. Your recent post literally says some brands push “luxury bongs that are fragile, hard to maintain, or just flat-out overpriced.” Worried about making enemies?
BH: What are they going to do, make their glass even thinner out of spite? Look, I respect companies like RooR and Illadelph—they make quality stuff. But when someone’s charging $800 for a basic beaker with their logo, that’s not quality, that’s marketing.
We charge $150 for a beaker with 16mm base thickness. Most “luxury” brands? 5-7mm if you’re lucky. So you tell me—who’s actually providing value?
DM: Walk me through what “16mm base thickness” actually means for someone who just wants to get high without their bong tipping over.
BH: It means you can actually use your bong without treating it like a Fabergé egg. A 16mm base is over half an inch of solid glass at the bottom. You could knock it with your elbow, bump it while cleaning, even have a cat jump on the table—it’s not going anywhere.
Compare that to standard 3-6mm bases. Those tip if you breathe too hard near them. And when you’re dealing with hot nails, torches, and water, the last thing you want is an unstable piece. It’s not just about preventing breaks—it’s about preventing burns, spills, and ruined sessions.
DM: Your customer service seems unusually… thorough. I read about employees calling customers to verify orders. In the age of automated everything, why the personal touch?
BH: Because returns are a pain in the ass for everyone. If someone orders an 18mm downstem and a 14mm bowl, there’s a 90% chance they messed up. Five-minute phone call now saves two weeks of shipping back and forth later.
Plus, it builds trust. When we call and say, “Hey, these parts won’t work together, did you mean to order this?” people appreciate it. One customer told us it was the first time a company actually cared if their stuff would work.
DM: You mentioned “Made To Order” services. In an industry built on mass production, how does custom work make sense?
BH: It doesn’t, financially. But that’s not the point. We kept getting emails—”Do you have this recycler in green?” or “Can you make a left-handed version?” For years, we had to say no because minimum order quantities made it impossible.
But then we realized—why not? If someone wants to pay for a custom piece and we have the capability, let’s do it. It’s not about maximizing profit on every transaction. It’s about taking care of people who support us.
DM: Let’s get technical. You talk about “Super Slit” diffusers. For the uninitiated, what makes a slit “super”?
BH: Density and precision. Most diffusers have maybe 20-30 slits. Ours have 50-100, depending on the design. More slits mean smaller bubbles, which means more surface area contacting the water, which means cooler, smoother smoke.
But here’s the catch—you can’t just drill a bunch of holes and call it a day. The slits need to be precisely sized and spaced for optimal airflow. Too many or too large, you get zero resistance and no filtration. Too few or too small, you can’t pull through it. It’s engineering, not guesswork.
DM: Your blog post about bong types reads like a consumer reports guide. You literally tell people NOT to buy certain styles. How does that help sales?
BH: Because honest advice builds trust. If someone wants a gravity bong and we don’t make good ones, I’d rather tell them to look elsewhere than sell them something subpar. They’ll remember that honesty next time they need something we do make well.
Take novelty bongs—we straight up say they compromise performance for looks. Are we leaving money on the table by not making bongs shaped like Rick and Morty characters? Sure. But that’s not what we’re about.
DM: You seem to have a particular hatred for thin glass. What’s the worst example you’ve seen?
BH: Oh man, I bought a “premium” piece from a well-known brand—won’t name names—that was supposed to have “competition-grade glass.” The thing was maybe 3mm thick with a male joint so thin you could flex it with your fingers. $300.
First time using it, the joint cracked from thermal expansion. Not abuse, not dropping it—just normal heating and cooling. That’s not premium, that’s planned obsolescence.
DM: Where do you see TAG in five years? Still fighting the good fight against thin glass?
BH: We’ll keep doing what works—making glass that lasts, explaining why it matters, and not insulting our customers’ intelligence with marketing fluff. The industry’s getting more educated, which helps us. People are starting to ask why their $400 bong broke in six months.
We’re also expanding our educational content. Planning a whole series on percolator types, airflow dynamics, maybe even some videos showing the difference between thin and thick glass under stress tests. Not sexy, but useful.
DM: Last question—what’s your advice for someone who’s been buying gas station glass and wants to upgrade?
BH: Start simple. Get a 12-inch beaker with at least 7mm thickness. Use it for a month. Then try to go back to thin glass—you physically won’t be able to. It’ll feel like smoking through a paper towel tube.
And don’t get sucked into the hype. You don’t need a $500 bong to have a good experience. You need proper materials, good engineering, and a design that matches how you actually smoke. Everything else is just marketing.
Oh, and learn to measure your joint size with a penny. It’ll save you more headaches than you can imagine.
Find TAG’s full collection of engineering-focused glass at thickassglass.com, where function always beats fashion—and the glass is thick enough to prove it.
